Gobble Gobble Users! Here Are 4 Reasons Why Your Website Is A Turkey

Ahhhhhhhhh Thanksgiving. It’s a turkey-licious time of the year…

It’s the time when you get a free pass to cram as much food into your mouth as possible and not be judged for it. It’s the time when you can drink an obscene amount of alcohol before dinner and not be judged for it. It’s the time when you can put up a lousy website for Black Friday and not be judged for it. Wait - forget that last one. Website judging never ends (no matter how drunk we all get at dinner).

Turkeys are delicious when they’re cooked right…and because we’ve been drinking Tito’s and water today, we feel the same concept applies to your website.

Cook it too long and it’s completely overdone. Cook it too short and it seriously lacks and gives everyone salmonella. Whatever the cooking fail…

Here are 4 reasons why your website is a turkey bust: 

1. It Looks Bad.

Your poorly designed website ranks even with someone pulling a burnt, dry, completely deformed bird out of the oven. If it doesn’t look good, odds are people aren’t going to eat it. And if people don’t eat it, be prepared for a lot of business leftovers.
Make sure your website has a layout that is clean, crisp and easy on the eyes…just like a perfectly roasted15 pound Butterball.

2. It Smells Bad.
A turkey in the oven is one of the greatest smells on the planet. Instant salivation. However, if your turkey or your website smells fishy…folks are going to be suspicious and leave.
Make sure your website doesn’t appear fishy by incorporating several ethical online elements such as a secure browser, contact details, an about us page, and a physical business location. Everyone online is fearful of scam websites that aim to steal…just like that shady guest nobody really knows at the dinner table who most likely has already lifted your dad’s wallet. Save the fish for Christmas Eve and make your website legit.

3. It’s Hard To Digest.
There’s nothing worse than being stricken with a severe case of acid reflux on Thanksgiving night. Yes, you probably will be able to get out of washing the dinner dishes and get first dibs on the recliner…but digestion issues completely kill the holiday buzz.
Avoid giving your website visitors agita by creating a well thought out design with clear, concise navigation. Nobody wants to surf your website forever trying to find what they came there for. Difficult navigation that is either hidden or hard to understand is extremely confusing and hard to digest…just like the stories your great-aunt Mildred tells on Thanksgiving night about her days spent touring with Little Richard. What?
4. It Won’t Stop Clucking.

If there’s one thing anyone should know about cooking a turkey for Thanksgiving, or any other day of the year for that matter, is that the bird should not be clucking when it’s served. If it talks – guests walk.
Make sure your website isn’t inundating your visitors with pop-up ads, newsletter sign-ups, surveys and unwanted music. Your visitors click on your site for something they want. And guess what they’re not there for? The background music on your website. No one wants to hear your website clucking…just like your politically incorrect uncle who only shows up for Thanksgiving when the Monster Truck Rally is in town on the same weekend.
Happy Thanksgiving from all of us at Scriptable Solutions!!

Author: Scriptable Solutions, LLC
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